not mine

my decision

made

a person

and yet

not me wholly

but in part

I see a little man

two and a half

a middle name we planned

realize he wouldn't have been

necessarily

if I moved somehow different. . .

shaking hands

would not have been

if I moved somehow. . .

lost job

would not have been

if I moved. . .

lukemia

would not have been

if I. .

or rather, if I didn't

what if

all were mine?

my son, my patient

my lost job

my loneliness

my prayers

way leads on to way

so

how do I pray?

he's his

a person, on accident?

not quite, I know

but wonder

my decision made

a person

and he's sick today

so I forget how sick this makes me

and pray

for what's not mine